No Speed Bumps

Spandex Sports Dicks

As we all know, guys need to think about sex about ... every 30 nanoseconds. A biological fact - no dispute.

So when you're out and about, you just have to take advantage of any and all perving opportunities that come your way. The public full frontal doesn't present itself that often! Of course if it does, for you ... post us immediately and tell us what the fuck we are doing wrong. No, we DO all know about the public toilet scene - I mean ... anything else.

One outdoor opportunity is the sports spandex dick.

Now, from the point of view of the spander (the wearer) as opposed to the spandee (the watcher), the real challenge is selecting the right look out of the whole gamut achievable by this wonder fabric.

On the spandex vulgar-ometer, if 1 (or 'classically tasteful') is Brandon Routh ...


... and 10 (or 'cheap and slutty') is my good friend here ...


... how would you rate the following guys:

A

B

C

D

E

Of course, sometimes the spander's basket needs a bit of major re-arrangement, to get it in good order for stuff like the group photo. (Just realized t!his guy could/should also be scored on the vularometer as a 10!)


Yep, that's better ...


... though I reckon we now have the equivalent of the Edwardian mono-bosom - no separation and delineation ...


... like the great S and D achieved here:


Okay, Mister de Mille!


Having said all this, there are still (maybe rare) opportunities for clapping your eyes on the public full frontal.






Such a great end to the post, don't you reckon?